Friday, July 30, 2010

Sharing is Loving

Pardon the cheesy title but this has been my motto for the past two weeks. Despite the fact that I am going through a career and financial crisis right now, I chose not to dwell on these setbacks but rather focus on my blessings. I realized that I still have a lot to share with other people - my time, my resources, and even my cooking expertise. hehe :) Since I was asked to go on an indefinite leave (refer to previous post), I had more time in my hands which I chose to spend in the kitchen instead of the library. I was able to cook several dishes like spaghetti which I shared with my CG, chicken sotanghon which I shared with my poi friends and housemates, chicken giniling which I shared with Twinx and Mel, fish tinola which I shared with my siblings and of course, my chicken sandwich spread which I shared with Ate Sansu and my officemates. Its always a delight to see the look on their faces. These may not be the tastiest dishes ever but I cooked it with passion. chos! ;)

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Crossroads... again

Here I am again, in a place where I have to decide on which path to choose. I was given the so-called "axe" today. The Boss told me that I wouldn't have to go to work everyday since they're still finalizing the plantilla positions. She gave me the option - whether to stay and wait or go and look for another job. I wasn't shocked by the news but I didn't expect my reaction because I retorted, "Go where?" It showed an utter lack of options. It was like being cornered in a wall with nowhere else to go. I hated that feeling - that sinking feeling of hopelessness as if my life depended on this job. Two years into the job and I've been wanting to leave because I didn't derive any sense of self-fulfillment anymore. Don't get me wrong, I am blessed and privileged to be part of this efficient staff but I always felt that I was not cut out for this kind of job. However, I needed some sense of stability so that I can support my siblings through college so I stayed on. To keep me busy and 'productive', I took up graduate studies and currently, legal studies.

Now, I have to weigh my options. I kept thinking, maybe this is a blessing in disguise. This is fate's way of telling me its time to move on. Pursue my dream job - whatever that is, I already have a vague idea. I wanna do it now while I'm still young and I got so many fresh ideas in my head.

But I know that I also have to be pragmatic with my decision. Two of my siblings are still in college and will be graduating this April. I still have 2.5 years to endure in lost school. If I have to work my ass off to support my studies, I need a job with a somewhat flexible schedule and a decent compensation. These are the things which are keeping me from moving on.

I honestly do not know what to do. But I'm hopeful and positive about this whole set-up. Its the perfect occasion to nudge me out of my complacency. I just keep on the brighter side - now, I'll have more time to catch up on my readings. :) And I would even have an extra time to pursue my advocacies.;)

So, I'm jotting this on my journal with a silent prayer for God to guide me and send me people and opportunities to help me get through this phase.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Kerygma Appearance

I was stalking myself on the cyberspace when I chanced upon this short article I wrote for the Kerygma magazine way back in October of 2007. I'm posting it here for posterity's sake ;)

Monday, July 5, 2010

This is my Conviction

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

— Nelson Mandela, 1994 Inaugural Speech